Defining the Undefinable

I'm back! Finally...it's been a crazy couple of weeks with preparation for finals (my last semester!) and some exciting personal changes that I'll be sure to share at a later date. : )  This post is dedicated to the definition and explanation of bipolar disorder, formerly termed manic depressive illness (the reason for the original nomenclature was to indicate that typically after a manic episode directly follows a depressive one, however, this has been proven to be untrue in all cases, albeit still very common).  I'll provide some boring information as well as definitions and explanations a la' Caitlin which will hopefully be of greater interest. 

The following definition comes from the website for the National Institution of Mental Health:

"What is Bipolar Disorder?

Bipolar disorder, also known as manic-depressive illness, is a brain disorder that causes unusual shifts in mood, energy, activity levels, and the ability to carry out day-to-day tasks. Symptoms of bipolar disorder are severe. They are different from the normal ups and downs that everyone goes through from time to time. Bipolar disorder symptoms can result in damaged relationships, poor job or school performance, and even suicide. But bipolar disorder can be treated, and people with this illness can lead full and productive lives.

Bipolar disorder often develops in a person's late teens or early adult years. At least half of all cases start before age 25. Some people have their first symptoms during childhood, while others may develop symptoms late in life.

Bipolar disorder is not easy to spot when it starts. The symptoms may seem like separate problems, not recognized as parts of a larger problem. Some people suffer for years before they are properly diagnosed and treated. Like diabetes or heart disease, bipolar disorder is a long-term illness that must be carefully managed throughout a person's life."

This rendering rings quite true in my own struggle with bipolar disorder.  I haven't developed much of a support network with other carriers of the disorder, which is a downfall that I should remedy.  It's easier most of the time to pretend it's not there, however.  I think others with the disease would agree with me on that count.  There's a sense of transient denial that I carry, but when confronted in an appointment or in a self-evaluation I can pull myself together to face it.  It's incredible the effect those situations have on me.  I'm not sure if everyone experiences this, but when I have to really think and focus on my mental reality, I sit right down and have myself a little pity party.  What a terrible way to face a situation ripe for surrendering to the Lord as a display of His grace and power in all things.  Hmm.  Thank you, Lord, for that little nugget of truth.  

And with that short and completely inadequate explanation, I'll submit this.  I will elaborate more on my journey in the next post.  Until then, "press on towards the goal to win the prize which calls us heavenward" (Philippians 3:14) and thank God for every moment that you get to bask in His grace.